I just had my first baby 3 months ago. While my perspective on motherhood deserves a blog post of its own, let me quickly paint a picture of what my "baby nights" look like with this running commentary...
1. It's midnight. I wonder if she's going to wake up for a feed. I'll wait a bit (checks Facebook).
2. Nope, looks like she's not going to wake up. I should really be following her sleep schedule but that last episode of Game of Thrones was so worth missing 2 hours of sleep.
3. And we're up at 2AM. Making formula...1 scoop, 2 scoops, 3 scoops...yawn.
4. Quick, plug it in before she wakes up the entire neighborhood.
5. Ah back to bed.
6. And we're up again at 5AM. Oh, fuck. POOPEXPLOSION!
7. Just got some on my finger. Now I'm really awake.
8. And now SHE's really awake too. Well, who wouldn't if you had that cold wipe sweeping down your ass...
9. You're cute but stop smiling and go back to sleep.
10. Ah shit, can't remember a lullaby. Oh well, Taylor Swift it is... 'cause haters gonna hate hate hate, shake it off! Shake it off!
